There’s this question that nags when I contemplate big changes. By big i mean changing professions, life partners, countries to live in – the changes that affect me and everyone around me for a good long time.
The question that nags is: am i doing this because it is exactly what my heart wants most, or am i changing my outside world because i can’t find internal peace and satisfaction. Yikes.
I’d love to recommend a book by Michael A. Singer entitled The Untethered Soul: a journey beyond yourself.
In the book, Singer beautifully describes the brain battle that goes on in our heads day in and day out. I should leave my job. No i shouldn’t. But i want to. But it’s stable. But it’s boring. But it pays well. What will Bob think? God, i’m a flake. But i’m happy overall. Blah, blah, to blahfinity.
He suggests we personify this head noise as a roommate, in which case we’d kick that nut out within about two hours of listening to her insane, repetitive monologue. That insane roommate is our mind.
He also suggests a simple, practical way to dissociate from that roommate and find the quiet, simple, loving centre of ourselves.
Every time your mind says, god, i don’t know if i can do it, i don’t think he’s the one for me, etc., your heart shuts down. You can feel this. It’s a tight-chest-and-jaw, fatiguing thing. As soon as you feel that, leave your mind to duke it out. Don’t stop it (you can’t stop it), just leave it.
Take your energy to your centre – your heart, the observer, the witness of the battle. Again, you can feel this. You can breathe. Your heart, chest, and face are relaxed and open. This removal of your energy from the mind shortens the battle by turning its power off. It leaves you with a blissfully quiet head. Do this a thousand times a day.
Finding the centre is the key.
If you have a method of finding that centre already – meditation, prayer, a cabin in the woods, a Buddha in your bathroom – go there.
If you don’t, and you’re looking for a method, consider the book.
Either way, don’t go to the insane roommate for advice on whether to leap. You won’t get a word in edgewise and you won’t come away any clearer.
Go to your heart.
Let me know what you think.
Thank you for the conversation,