Meditation Camp

Posted on September 23, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

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Have you been to a meditation camp before?

Having just returned from a five day version, I’d like to summarize the effects for you. This will come in handy if you decide to go yourself. It will also be useful if your friends or loved ones go and you are faced with the task of welcoming them home.

You don’t eat much at these things. A walnut is a substantial snack. Two days after my return home, I’m still eating out of what are basically Barbie bowls. Don’t be alarmed by this. It feels great.
You develop a slowness that can alarm the folks at home. My lovely man says, “Good morning.” After a few minutes, he says, “Are you all right?” Minutes later, I say, “Yes. I was contemplating your words.” Don’t be alarmed by this.
An enormous love develops for everyone. This morning I called an insurance company to discuss their policy on arch supports. By the end of the call, I told Connie she was so beautiful that it made my heart ache. I was a bit weepy. Don’t be alarmed by this as long as it’s a long distance call and you’re unlikely to meet Connie. Ever.

Everything that drove you crazy at home before now looks sweet and gentle. Doing the dishes. God, it still takes my breath a way. The warm water, the suds, the clean counter.  I’m too choked up to comment on whether or not you should be alarmed by this.
Your behaviors change. I brought my dog to work yesterday for the first time in 20 years. She’s an escape artist and would gladly go home with any of my patients, or plastered on the front bumper of a car if she had the opportunity. Both of those possibilities seemed the epitome of bliss to me yesterday. Today I’m alarmed by that.
All of this aside, it was fantastic to spend some time off the crazy mental grid, finding out who I am underneath the noise of daily life.

Have you been? Would you like to go? I’d love to hear.
Thanks to meditation for messing with my ridiculous mind. Thanks to yoga and its contemplative, meditative center. And thanks to you, you heartbreakingly beautiful thing, for the conversation. I love you, man.
Kristin
Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario.  Join her on the web at kristinshepherd.ca, on Facebook at Dr. Kristin Shepherd, or on Twitter at kristinwonders.
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Leaving the Circus

Posted on September 21, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

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“We usually don’t look, we overlook.”
Alan Watts
I’m off to a meditation camp this morning. It’s a good thing.
There are days, like today, when I begin to overlook, when landing fully and immediately in the moment is something that only happens to calmer people. I’m no circus act or anything.

There are no plates spinning on my nose.  There is no unicycle. No monkeys, except for my monkey mind.

My thoughts on waking are, “Oh, god, I’m pinned between Pat (my lovely man) and Rosie (my sometimes lovely dog), it’s no wonder I can’t sleep. I’ve got one sixth of the bed to myself. I’ll have to amputate my legs to get a good sleep with you two. And rats, I forgot to open the window last night, which is why there is no air to breathe in here. And shoot, who left the suitcase on the floor for me to trip over in the dark? I did. Rats.”
It’s only a minute or three before I catch this thinking and wrestle it to the ground, but that’s three minutes of my one and only life spent body slamming an opponent who looks more like me than a monkey should.
Today’s practice, while my coffee drips, is Forever Downward Dog. This means Downward Dog until I meet my monkey mind once (oh, this is ridiculous, I’ve got to pack), twice (oh, great, now the coffee’s just sitting there, getting cold), three times (shoot, I’ve got a load of laundry in the washer and I need that purple shirt for my trip. I can’t meditate without that shirt), and four times. I hold Downward Dog until I know I’m in Downward Dog and nowhere else.
And then, ahhhhhhhh, something lets go, the monkeys and rats and spinning plates go back to sleep, and I’m here. Here is such a good place.
Do you wake up with monkeys, ever? (Do you sleep with your dog? Don’t start.) Does yoga bring you here?  Do you have a Forever Pose?
Thanks to the monkeys for teaching me what here isn’t. Thanks to yoga for stopping the circus. Thanks to you, always, for the conversation,
Kristin
Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario. Join her on the web at kristinshepherd.ca, on Facebook at Dr. Kristin Shepherd, and on Twitter at kristinwonders.
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Ed

Posted on September 20, 2010 by kristinshepherd

A man named Ed comes to my clinic every second Wednesday. He arrives 40 minutes before my afternoon hours begin. When I ask him why he arrives so early, he says he can’t keep himself away from me. Ed is 80 years old.

He begins each appointment by paying me, in case he forgets on the way out. Then he drops a bag on the counter, saying, you can eat these or throw them out, whatever you like. There is always an apple in the bag. The other contents vary. This week he brought a Kitkat bar and two doughnuts he’d made the night before. He’d prefer a fatter version of me.

After taking care of Ed’s remarkably healthy back, we come back to my front desk, at which point he pulls out his harmonica. He plays my favourite (You Are My Sunshine) and then whichever tune he’s been working on all week. He’s happiest if there are now people waiting for their own appointments. He’s best with a sizable audience.

I bought a harmonica two years ago, promising Ed I’d learn to play so that we could do Christmas carols together. It’s harder than it looks. I gave my harmonica to Ed last Christmas.

I told Ed last week that I’m closing my clinic soon. He didn’t say much. Well. I see. I see. When he played You Are My Sunshine he stared at me for all he was worth through his thick glasses. He said, I’ll see you in two weeks, and he left.

I’m telling you this for two reasons.

First, I want to share Ed with you before I leave my clinic. If you see him, ask him to play for you. He’ll be looking for a new venue.

Second, it’s tempting to shut my heart down, just slightly, while telling people I’m leaving. I love them, and I don’t love being sad, but I suspect it’s truer and healthier to let goodbyes stare us in the face and heart.

Thanks to Ed for teaching me that, and thanks to you for the conversation,

kristin

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Two Words

Posted on September 16, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

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Here’s a business idea for someone. In my clinic, we talk some days about having only two words left to say in your life.
Maybe your throat is closing permanently, maybe you suddenly find silence far more attractive than words, maybe you just run out of things to say – I don’t know. The important part is discovering the words you’d choose to say to yourself and the world if you only have two left.

I asked someone this morning what her words would be. She said, “Taxes stink.” It made us laugh, because those are so not the words she’d pick. So not the words any of us would pick if we only had two left.
When I play this game, lots of options come to mind:
Let go
Be brave
Beauty everywhere
Sing loudly
Forgiveness heals
My favorite every time is Love Wins. That’s the one I want stamped on my mat.
There’s the business idea. Custom stamping of yoga mats.
So let’s imagine you can have your own stamped mat. What would yours say?
Thanks to the person who starts this business. I wish you all the success you deserve. I will buy your mat. Thanks to the yoga mats we stare at, and thanks, always, to you for your two words.
Kristin
Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario. Join her at kristinshepherd.ca, or at Dr.Kristin Shepherd on Facebook, or on Twitter at kristinwonders.
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Things I Learned Over My Summer Holidays

Posted on September 14, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

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Holy Moly. I’ve just finished my first class in six weeks. I’ve been practicing almost daily at home, but not in studio.

Things I Learned Over My Summer Holiday, or Things I Really Learned When I Stepped Back Into Class:

1. I’m really good at Sun Salutations, because I love them. By good, I do not refer to form or finesse, but rather to enthusiasm and brute strength. I could now push my car to work if I had to.

2. I really am not good at almost everything that comes after Sun Salutations, because I practice what I love more than the stuff that makes me say, “Oh, god, here we go again.”
I am worst at Triangle Pose, which is still the bane of my existence  Closely followed by Extended Side Angle Pose. And by Camel.  Okay, there are others, too.

3. I was not holding anything for a count of five during the summer. I was holding for a count of “whatever”, which is almost always less than five. When in Triangle Pose, I count to .05.
On the other hand:
4. A good teacher is an incredible gift. There are about 7,000 things for me to learn, still, even during Sun Salutations.

5. I missed the quiet humor of our classes.

6. It is beautiful to be surrounded by yogis and yoginis, all loving this thing we do.

7. Oh, and the chanting. Yup. The chanting is better in class. My chanting was getting a bit thin and lonely.
It’s good to be back. Do you feel the same? No? Do you take holidays from classes at all?
Thanks to yoga for Solo Sun Salutations and Group Extended Side Angle Poses, and thanks to you for the conversation,
Kristin

Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario.  Join her on the net at kristinshepherd.ca, on Facebook at Dr. Kristin Shepherd, and on Twitter at kristinwonders.
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Things I Learned Over My Summer Holidays

Posted on September 14, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

back to class.JPG

Holy Moly. I’ve just finished my first class in six weeks. I’ve been practicing almost daily at home, but not in studio.

Things I Learned Over My Summer Holiday, or Things I Really Learned When I Stepped Back Into Class:

1. I’m really good at Sun Salutations, because I love them. By good, I do not refer to form or finesse, but rather to enthusiasm and brute strength. I could now push my car to work if I had to.

2. I really am not good at almost everything that comes after Sun Salutations, because I practice what I love more than the stuff that makes me say, “Oh, god, here we go again.”
I am worst at Triangle Pose, which is still the bane of my existence  Closely followed by Extended Side Angle Pose. And by Camel.  Okay, there are others, too.

3. I was not holding anything for a count of five during the summer. I was holding for a count of “whatever”, which is almost always less than five. When in Triangle Pose, I count to .05.
On the other hand:
4. A good teacher is an incredible gift. There are about 7,000 things for me to learn, still, even during Sun Salutations.

5. I missed the quiet humor of our classes.

6. It is beautiful to be surrounded by yogis and yoginis, all loving this thing we do.

7. Oh, and the chanting. Yup. The chanting is better in class. My chanting was getting a bit thin and lonely.
It’s good to be back. Do you feel the same? No? Do you take holidays from classes at all?
Thanks to yoga for Solo Sun Salutations and Group Extended Side Angle Poses, and thanks to you for the conversation,
Kristin

Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario.  Join her on the net at kristinshepherd.ca, on Facebook at Dr. Kristin Shepherd, and on Twitter at kristinwonders.
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Yoga From Your Neck of the Woods

Posted on September 9, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

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In my neck of the woods, trees twist up through rock. Canadian Shield is the name of the rock that is our foundation as far as you can see. In some areas we’ve got soil – our cities are as pretty and tame that way as any other – but outside the city things get wilder. Off the highway, winding gravel roads lead to lakes surrounded by masses of grey and pink rock. It’s a miracle that anything grows on it.
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But miracles happen. Lichen grows, moss grows, ferns grow, all of them creating the tiniest cracks in the rock. At some point, red pine and cedar find those cracks, attempt a few roots, and twist their way sunward. I was at one of these lakes this weekend, doing yoga on a platform about 15 feet above blue waves and whitecaps.
It occurs to me during practice that I am not so different than one of our twisted trees.
With every Downward Facing Dog my own roots sink into the rock.  (I groan while this is happening. The trees do not, as far as I know.) With every instruction to rotate my shoulders and thighs I feel as though I am untwisting my way sunward. Every bit of it is working against the hard-as-Canadian-Shield habits my body has acquired over a lifetime.
There is nothing pretty or tame about my yoga.This body grunts and sighs with each shift, all the while shifting from tree-trunk stiffness to something greener and leafier.
I am a Canadian Shield kind of beautiful. So’s my yoga.
What kind of beautiful are you?
Thanks to the living, breathing world out there for inspiring us. Thanks to yoga for showing me who I am, and thanks to you for the conversation,
Kristin
Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario.  Join her on Facebook at Dr.Kristin Shepherd, on the web at kristinshepherd.ca, and on Twitter at kristinwonders.

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Yoga From Your Neck of the Woods

Posted on September 9, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

Blueberry Island Twisted Tree.JPG

In my neck of the woods, trees twist up through rock. Canadian Shield is the name of the rock that is our foundation as far as you can see. In some areas we’ve got soil – our cities are as pretty and tame that way as any other – but outside the city things get wilder. Off the highway, winding gravel roads lead to lakes surrounded by masses of grey and pink rock. It’s a miracle that anything grows on it.
.  
But miracles happen. Lichen grows, moss grows, ferns grow, all of them creating the tiniest cracks in the rock. At some point, red pine and cedar find those cracks, attempt a few roots, and twist their way sunward. I was at one of these lakes this weekend, doing yoga on a platform about 15 feet above blue waves and whitecaps.
It occurs to me during practice that I am not so different than one of our twisted trees.
With every Downward Facing Dog my own roots sink into the rock.  (I groan while this is happening. The trees do not, as far as I know.) With every instruction to rotate my shoulders and thighs I feel as though I am untwisting my way sunward. Every bit of it is working against the hard-as-Canadian-Shield habits my body has acquired over a lifetime.
There is nothing pretty or tame about my yoga.This body grunts and sighs with each shift, all the while shifting from tree-trunk stiffness to something greener and leafier.
I am a Canadian Shield kind of beautiful. So’s my yoga.
What kind of beautiful are you?
Thanks to the living, breathing world out there for inspiring us. Thanks to yoga for showing me who I am, and thanks to you for the conversation,
Kristin
Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) in North Bay, Ontario.  Join her on Facebook at Dr.Kristin Shepherd, on the web at kristinshepherd.ca, and on Twitter at kristinwonders.

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Explosive Insight

Posted on September 7, 2010 by Kristin Shepherd

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I jumped into yoga last year with great expectations of increased strength and flexibility.  I also had some notion that looking inward would be a part of it. Except for the astounding stubbornness of my left hamstrings, yoga meets all of my expectations. But there have also been gorgeous and unexpected benefits.
 
Yesterday my smoothie blew up at work. It’s a long story and isn’t the real point today, so I’ll just warn you not to put screw top lids on smoothies if you’re going to let them sit on your desk at work all day during the summer. Another tip: if you hear hissing sounds coming from your smoothie cup, call a bomb squad. If you decide not to heed this advice, be prepared to wash your walls, your computer, and your desk. Be prepared to throw out your favorite (formerly) white sweater. Be prepared for purple, goopy imprints on everything that emerges from your printer for 24 hours.  Be prepared for a purple, goopy bruise on your left shoulder.  Just saying.

The point is this:  When my smoothie bomb blew, my only reactions were amazement and laughter. Over and over, I said to an empty room, “This is amazing! This is amazing!”  And I’m still laughing. It wasn’t till later that I realized there’s been a shift over the year in my reactions to all kinds of bombs.

If that smoothie had blown last year, I would have done a prolonged dance with no-time-for-this frustration and woe-is-me drama. I think the daily focus involved in my yoga practice makes me more permeable to the goopy feelings. They pour through me more easily than they used to. My smoothie event stuck to everything in my office except me. This is a huge, unexpected benefit of my year of practice.
Have you had unexpected benefits? I’d appreciate you sharing them. I’ll bet we’d all appreciate you sharing them.
Thanks to explosive insights, thanks to yoga for delivering so much more than I’d hoped for, and thanks to you, as always, for the conversation,
Kristin
Dr. Kristin Shepherd is a chiropractor, actor, and speaker (about All Things Wonderful) from North Bay, Ontario.  Join her on Facebook at Dr. Kristin Shepherd, on the web at kristinshepherd.ca, or on Twitter at kristinonders.
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Walking the Plank of Change

Posted on September 3, 2010 by kristinshepherd

A few posts ago, i mentioned i’m ending my clinical practice of 20 years.  I told you i’d let you know how it was going.

Well, here it is.  My last day in clinic is October 22nd….  There’s the update, really.

I expected insomnia, gnashing of teeth, gnashing of finger- and toenails, scaly, weeping bald patches, you name it.  I expected a lot of fear.

True, i don’t know what i’ll do for a living next.  True, i haven’t been unemployed since i started babysitting 34 years ago.  True, this would have “shivered me timbers” (why a pirate idiom?  i have no idea) even two years ago.

Well holy anticlimax, pirates.  Maybe all of the gnashing happened before the decision.  I don’t know.  All i feel to date is an  sense of peace in my chest.  And freedom.  And a small thrill of adventure.

Funny.  It occurs to me that fear before the fact was my constant companion.  I’ll bet that background fear interferes with our vision in some ways.  I’ll bet it interferes with us seeing our own desires clearly.  (A bit like a black  eye patch, come to think of it!)

I’ve found a lovely, kind chiropractor with an open mind and good ears who is happy to welcome the folks from my clinic.  Thank you Greg.

And the folks at my clinic are as beautiful as ever, which will break my heart wide open at the end of October.  Nothing wrong with that.

I report this non-report in case you’ve been gnashing your own toenails about a decision.  It appears the gnashing ends with a step forward.

Granted, this may all change between now and October 22nd.  (I’ll bet not, but I’ll keep you posted.)

Thanks to every gorgeous heart in my clinic.  Thanks to the futures that call and call and call us forward.

And arrrhhh, thanks to you, you captain of the Caribbean,  for the conversation,

kristin

Join me on Facebook at Dr.Kristin Shepherd and on Twitter at kristinwonders. ( How many conversations can one pirate have?)

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